Assisted Living for Muslim Seniors

Muslim seniors and their family members face various challenges and concerns in the United States. While religious values traditionally place senior caregiving duties on families, this may not be practical. Most family members are out of the home working or studying all day, which can result in inadequate care for senior loved ones. It can also increase loneliness and isolation, which can ultimately be detrimental to an elderly person’s overall health.

Although assisted living may be a practical solution for many seniors, Muslim families often worry about discrimination, nutrition and lifestyle factors. In short, Muslim seniors often face greater barriers to long-term care than their non-Muslim contemporaries.

An estimated 3.45 million Muslims live in the United States, a figure that continues to increase. The number of Muslim seniors will also increase, meaning that senior care considerations are likely to become more pressing and prevalent.

This guide discusses religious considerations related to senior care and tips for overcoming cultural guilt. It looks at common barriers to assisted living for Muslim seniors and how to identify suitable Islamic-friendly residential facilities.

Islam sees old age as a blessing from Allah. Respecting Allah involves respecting the elderly, and showing kindness toward seniors is a way of showing love for Allah.

As such, the religion places a strong emphasis on caring for aging parents, similar to the Chinese concept of filial piety. In Islam, children of both genders have an equal obligation to care for their parents, particularly the mother. Looking after elderly parents is a religious obligation, not just an expectation. Both the Quran and customs modeled by the Prophet Mohammed emphasize the concept of silat ar-rahim. Islamic teachings also state that the devotion and duty to parents is only second to that of Allah. Adult children are expected to put their elderly parents’ care needs above anyone else’s, including their own. Care and support include ensuring physical and mental needs are met as well as providing financial support.

For Muslims who don’t have children, their wider community is expected to take care of them as they age. An older person may go and live with nieces, nephews or younger friends of the family.

In Islam, abandoning parents is viewed as a grave sin. This can make families feel uncomfortable with the idea of placing older relatives into residential care settings, such as assisted living. Similarly, communities may feel as though they have failed their religious duties if a childless Muslim elder moves to an organized care setting as opposed to receiving support from the Islamic community.

When considering assisted living, Muslim seniors and their family members often have doubts. Many individuals share common fears and difficulties when it comes to moving to an organized care setting. Things you and your loved one may worry about include:

Elderly Muslims typically worry about facing discrimination outside of their communities. Many outlets report Islamophobia throughout the country, and a 2021 report from the United Nations provides that anti-Muslim sentiments run high through the general U.S. population. Studies show a link between anti-Islamic prejudice and stigma with negative health impacts. Reasons include fear of seeking help and institutionalized discrimination. Older Muslims may fear receiving substandard care in assisted living communities compared with their non-Muslim peers. They commonly worry about facing discrimination from those tasked with providing care and ensuring their well-being.

As well as worrying about discrimination and abuse or neglect from caregivers, elderly Muslims might be concerned about their modesty and dignity within an assisted living community. For example, many older Muslims wouldn’t feel comfortable with an aide of the opposite gender helping them with personal care tasks, such as bathing and dressing. This may cause distress or result in seniors refusing care.

Muslims often worry about being able to eat according to their religion when in an assisted living community. Seniors and their families typically worry about culinary teams being able to prepare halal meals. This may prevent families from considering assisted living as a suitable care option. In extreme cases, seniors may become malnourished if they won’t eat meals provided in assisted living communities.

Elderly Muslims may seek reassurance that moving to an assisted living community won’t impact their clothing choices and that caregivers will assist appropriately with laundry and dressing. Some may also feel more comfortable if their care team, particularly females, observe Islamic standards of dress.

Pet-friendly assisted living communities may not be suitable for devout Muslims, and families may reject facilities that allow dogs.

Seniors may worry that they won’t be able to perform their daily religious rituals and prayers in an assisted living facility. Aging Muslims may require assistance with ablutions and supplications. Senior men may find it emotionally challenging to be unable to go to the mosque to pray, particularly on Fridays. Not being able to worship as they wish can negatively impact a senior’s mental and emotional well-being.

Muslims may fear that assisted living will be a barrier to them following certain traditions and customs. For example, although Islam says that the elderly are exempted from fasting during the holy month of Ramadan, many Islamic elders still try to observe other customs, such as enjoying iftar with their family. However, many seniors still wish to fast, which can have health implications that caregivers must be aware of. Individuals may also worry about missing out on major religious celebrations, such as Eid al-Adha and Eid al-Fitr.

For many families, the guilt of moving an elderly relative to an assisted living community may feel overwhelming. However, for Muslim families this guilt can feel even more crushing. Children may find it hard to get over the feeling that they’ve let their parents down and neglected their duties both as a child and as a Muslim. You haven’t done anything wrong by considering alternative care options. These tips may help you feel better about sending your loved one to live in an assisted living community:

• Appropriate Care: Remember that assisted living often provides higher standards of care that meet your loved one’s needs. With a team of caregivers often available around the clock, residents often receive more attention than they would in a busy household. Also, assisted living removes the possibility of caregiver burnout, which can negatively impact the health of both you and your relative.
• Mealtimes: Visit loved ones regularly for mealtimes. This allows you to check that the community is providing an appropriate diet and, if a parent sees their child also dining, it can reassure them that meals are suitable. You can also prepare your relative’s favorite meals to enjoy together.
• Prayers: Visit loved ones regularly for prayer times. This can help them to feel more spiritually connected to their family. For families that live far away from each other, joining each other online for virtual prayers may offer comfort. Children and other younger relatives may consider taking their relatives to visit the mosque on Fridays, particularly for those who live in communities with no on-site prayer room or visiting imam.
• Holidays: Where possible, you can take your loved ones home to celebrate special Islamic holidays. If it’s not practical for seniors to leave their assisted living community, you can visit them to enjoy familiar activities together.

When comparing assisted living facilities for Muslim seniors, several features may make communities more suitable and attractive than others. Choosing the right community directly impacts a senior’s comfort and happiness and also adds to the family’s peace of mind. Things to look for include:

Appropriate communities should offer nutritious and appealing meals prepared with halal ingredients. In an ideal world, kitchens wouldn’t contain any haram products. Practically, though, in kitchens that prepare meals that cater to diverse needs, special care should be taken to prevent contamination. Depending on how strict a Muslim is, they may wish to look for facilities with separate dining areas.

Suitable assisted living communities for Muslims generally have a dedicated prayer room or a multi-faith area that Muslims can use. There should be suitable areas nearby where seniors can perform their ablutions. Communities may consider arranging for regular imam visits, too. Assisted living facilities should demonstrate a commitment to helping Muslim seniors live a spiritual life, which is increasingly important for an older Muslim’s well-being.

Many assisted living communities provide free scheduled transportation for community outings, shopping trips and medical appointments. Muslim-friendly facilities may also provide transportation to the local mosque, especially each Friday.

Where possible, families should identify assisted living communities that already have a sizable percentage of Muslim residents. This can help their elder relatives feel more settled and have a sense of religious community within the wider assisted living community.

Suitable assisted living facilities for Muslims should have robust anti-discrimination policies and procedures. Such policies should also be strictly enforced. Anti-discrimination measures should apply equally to members of staff, outside contractors and other residents.

Ideal facilities for Muslims will have some members of staff who are either Muslim themselves or who have in-depth cultural and religious understanding. All facilities should have sufficient staffing to meet individual needs as set out in their personalized care plans and staff should have completed all necessary training and hold any relevant licenses or certifications.

Assisted living facilities should offer a balance of enrichment and engagement activities that nurture overall wellness while keeping in mind cultural sensitivities. Individuals should look at which wellness services are provided, such as on-site nursing overnight, on-site rehabilitation therapies, regular exercise classes, fall prevention education and medication management.

Several organizations and agencies provide support and guidance for older members of the Muslim community and their families. You can contact these groups to learn more: