A Guide to Senior Respite Care

When an aging loved one starts needing help, a family member may provide care rather than hire a stranger. Most family caregivers will do anything in their power to ensure their loved one has access to needed resources to stay comfortable and healthy. However, this can sometimes be at the expense of the caregivers’ own health and well-being if they don’t keep up with their own needs. 

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about 53% of caregivers worry a decline in their own health affects how they care for a loved one. Many caregivers also experience higher levels of stress, anxiety or depression, which can make it harder to provide high-quality care. If you’ve been caring for a loved one and are starting to feel burnt out, senior respite care can temporarily relieve you of these responsibilities while ensuring your relative still has access to needed care. 

This guide provides an overview of respite care, how it benefits caregivers and what types of respite care are available. You can also explore costs, financial assistance and ways to find the right provider for your loved one. 

Respite care provides short-term relief for family caregivers, whether it’s for an afternoon while you run errands or for several days while you’re on a trip. The care can be in your loved one’s home, at an adult day center or at a health care facility. The point of respite care is to make it easier for family caregivers to find more balance in their lives and take a break when needed. 

Respite care providers offer numerous services catered to fit your loved one’s unique needs. These services include:

• Assistance with daily living activities such as bathing, dressing and grooming
• Housekeeping and laundry services
• Transportation to appointments or activities
• Supervision and companionship
• Grocery shopping and meal preparation
• Medication management

Although caregiving can be rewarding, it can also be challenging if you’re doing it alone and feel as if you have no time to take care of yourself. If you constantly feel too stressed or busy and caregiving affects your ability to care for your loved one or your own needs, the benefits of respite care include:

• Rest and relaxation: Caregiving is typically a full-time job, and it’s important to take the occasional break. Rest can improve your overall mood and reduce stress and anxiety. Taking a break can help you clear your mind so you can better focus once you return.
• Less social isolation: As a caregiver, you’re likely spending a lot of time with your loved one but not much with anyone else. Feeling disconnected from friends or other family members can lead to social isolation or loneliness. Respite care offers you time to catch up with others and enjoy activities such as taking a trip or going out to lunch.
• Improved health: Caregiving can be stressful. When left untreated, long-term stress can cause health problems such as headaches, digestive issues, chest pain and difficulty concentrating. Using respite care services to take occasional breaks can reduce stress and improve your overall health. 
• Less tension: Spending too much time together can create tension or cause arguments. Respite care allows you and your loved one to take a break from each other and engage with other people. The time apart can reduce tension and help you look forward to seeing your loved one again. 
• More assistance: The challenges associated with caregiving can often feel worse when you’re doing it alone. Respite care offers a trained professional to reduce your workload and answer any questions or concerns you have. This may make caregiving a bit easier even when the provider isn’t around. 

Several respite care options are available, depending on your personal situation and relative’s needs. If you have trusted friends or family members willing to help, informal respite care may be a solution. There are also many formal respite care services if you’re seeking a trained professional. The table below contains more information on respite care options. 

Choosing respite care can be difficult, especially if you’ve been the only person to care for your loved one. However, it may be necessary if you’re struggling with caregiver burnout or other physical and emotional symptoms. Here are a few signs that it may be time to invest in respite care. 

Research shows between 40% and 70% of caregivers experience clinical symptoms of depression, which can be triggered by social isolation or being overworked. Taking care of another person full time can be mentally draining. If you don’t take a break to focus on your own mental health, you may become irritated and take your frustration out on others. This is a major sign it may be time for respite care. 

Everyone experiences days when they’re less productive, but if it starts to become a daily trend, you may want to seek help. Respite care can give you more time to participate in enjoyable activities or hobbies. This may boost your mood and help you feel more energized and motivated when returning to your caregiving duties. 

You may have a lot of daily tasks such as housekeeping, grocery shopping, driving to doctor’s appointments and preparing meals. If you start to lose patience with your relative because of how much work you have every day, it may be time to take a step back and let someone else help.

When you feel overworked and constantly stressed, you may get sick more often. One study shows working more than 55 hours per week can lead to serious health issues such as stroke or heart disease. It’s important to listen to your body and rest when you need it. Respite care can give you time to rest and visit the doctor if you find yourself getting sick more often.

Respite care costs depend on the type of care you choose and where you live. Here’s a breakdown of the average daily costs of respite care according to the 2021 Genworth Cost of Care Survey. 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by respite care costs, you may be eligible for financial assistance. Take a look at the following options to see if any apply. 

Low-income individuals may be eligible for Medicaid benefits for respite care if they meet their state’s income requirements. However, the state only pays for up to 5 days, including the admission date. The Home and Community-Based Services (HCBS) waiver may also cover respite care if you meet your state’s requirements. You can check your state’s Medicaid guidelines to see if additional assistance is available. 

Veterans receiving a VA pension may be eligible for respite care assistance via the Aid and Attendance benefit. To qualify, you must meet at least one health requirement, such as requiring daily living assistance, being homebound due to an illness or disability or having limited eyesight. You’ll need to submit a few documents, including a doctor’s report showing your loved one requires care. 

The VA also offers respite care for up to 30 days for veterans meeting certain criteria for services, such as being isolated or requiring assistance with daily living activities. If respite care is provided at a facility, you must also meet the community’s guidelines, which will vary based on location. 

Most private insurance plans don’t cover respite care, but long-term care insurance usually does, depending on your policy. Generally, policies cover respite care for up to 21 days per year in a nursing home, adult day center or at home. Life insurance benefits can also pay for respite care. The amount of money you’ll receive can vary, but typically, payments are capped at 50% of the death benefit, meaning you may not get as much assistance as other options. 

If you’re putting your loved one’s care in someone else’s hands, you want the best respite care provider available. There are a few things to consider when choosing a provider. 

When searching for providers, check out the services they offer to see if they align with your expectations. If your loved one needs any type of medical care, verify the provider has the appropriate licensing and trained staff to accommodate it. 

If you’re seriously considering a provider, ask for references or check online reviews from previous families and clients. These can give you a good idea of how a provider conducts business and whether previous clients were satisfied with their services. 

Even if you find one provider you really like, it’s still important to evaluate all available options. You want the best for your loved one, and that won’t be a quick and easy decision. You can list the pros and cons of each provider and see how they compare based on your loved one’s needs and your expectations.

If this is your first time seeking a respite care provider, it can be difficult to identify good qualities. Here are a few examples of what to look for in a respite care provider:

• Remains respectful and patient toward clients
• Offers experience providing respite care
• Follows individualized care plans
• Provides backup in case of illness or injury
• Remains calm in emergency situations
• Offers a wide range of services
• Follows proper caregiving methods
• Has reviews or references from past families

Scheduling respite care is generally simple, but it’s important to plan to ensure you get the provider you want when you need them. You also want to ensure your loved one is comfortable with the provider before leaving them alone. Here are a few tips for preparing for respite care:

• Schedule in advance: If you have a planned vacation or event you know you need respite care for, book a provider as far in advance as possible. This ensures you’ll get a spot with your preferred provider.
• Know the admissions process: You’ll need to fill out a lot of paperwork, so it’s good to have your loved one’s information readily available. It’s also important to ensure the provider operates in accordance with state requirements. 
• Understand the cost: Respite care rates and included services vary, depending on the provider and whether the care is administered at home or a community. You can ask the provider directly what services you’re getting for what you’re paying. 
• Introduce your loved one: Your loved one should feel comfortable with their provider while you’re not around. Introducing them can determine their compatibility before leaving them alone.
• Develop a care plan: To ensure your loved one’s needs are met, you can create a care plan or leave instructions on what your relative needs help with and other important information, including what time they take meals or medications. 
• Decide what to bring: If your loved one is going to a community or day center, you can ask the provider for a list of items and amenities they provide. This can help you determine what to pack for your loved one. 

Respite care is designed for you to relax and focus on your own needs, but that doesn’t mean you’re completely isolated from your loved one. However, you shouldn’t spend your whole break feeling guilty and worried about their well-being. Here are a few ways to make the most out of respite care:

• Managing guilt: It’s normal to feel some guilt, but remember your loved one is in good hands with a caregiver you personally chose. You can also periodically check in with the provider for a status update.
• Staying connected: Spending some time apart may cause you to miss seeing your loved one. There are several ways to stay connected, whether it’s via phone call, video chat or text. You can teach your loved one how to navigate technology or ask the provider to help them. 
• Listening to your body: There’s no right way to spend your free time while your loved one is in respite care. You may feel pressured to see as many people or participate in as many activities as possible. However, if you feel tired and worn out, it’s important to listen to your body and spend that time relaxing instead. 
• Preparing for duty: Like with any job, returning to duty after a break can be challenging. Take time to mentally prepare yourself. Practice self-care or determine what changes need to be made to prevent future burnout or stress.